Tip 1: You don’t run their life.
You don’t run their life, you guide it. Change your mindset from “they need to do what I say” to “how can I guide them to understand what I am asking” Toddler rhythm is just that it’s their rhythm.
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Tip 2: They will always be late.
Toddlers aren’t going to do things in your time but in theirs. So create new ways of teaching timeliness. Maybe your toddler is interested in watches. Kbebe is and for Christmas, he is getting a watch and we are working on timeliness.
What that means for our Chaos Flow is that we are teaching him to be more aware of time. We won’t change our fluid schedule but we will start implementing how to be on time. By using something he is interested in we are able to connect in his way, not ours.
Tip 3: “Chore Charts” are not forever.
Kbebe has a chore chart but after a week of it, we both were over it. The way ours was set up I made him add stickers in a pattern. That way I was teaching rhythm and pattern recognition in one. The day we stopped putting emphasis on it was the day he said: “I need to go make my bed mommy.”
He just got it! Now if the rhythm starts to shift I will probably bring it back. However, I think it shouldn’t be relied on so heavily at this age. It is a tool and once mastered can be set aside. Watch your children for clues and you will be amazed at what they can do.
Tip 4: The sky’s awake so they are awake.
No matter how hard I try, I cannot get either kid back to sleep once they wake up for the day. Lately , hat means 5:45 AM. Which throws off my rhythm completely.
That’s the thing with parental chaos, you have to be flexible for change. You have to give yourself grace. Then the day comes when you realize you haven’t showered in 2 weeks. So you adjust, take the shower an hour earlier, and drown yourself in coffee.
Tip 5: Stop comparing your toddler to other kids.
None of us have our chaos managed. We are all working on it and through it. Social media tells a different story, don’t fall for it.
Tip 6: Make bedtime a priority.
Yeah, I’m all about the Chaos Flow but that doesn’t mean they go to bed whenever. Both kids are in bed around 7:30 PM. The one set time I have, bedtime. Yes, it means they get up early but they need their rest.
On another side of bedtime, it also means alone time for the adults. And let’s face it, we all need that alone time. Alone time to strengthen our relationship and to just relax.
Tip 7: Let them be.
If it isn’t making you late for something important don’t rush them. I find myself frustrated asking Kbebe to hurry up. When I finally give him a moment to speak he usually says something sweet. For example the other day he said, “But mommy I just wanted to get a honey stick. One for me and one for my sissy.”
Their hearts are so big and their minds are still growing. Let them be and watch them grow. It’s seriously so cool to watch why they are doing what they are doing. As opposed to being irritated that they are doing it.
Tip 8: It’s ok to not be perfect.
There are days when the kids watch Moana on repeat. Ok, judgey-mcjudgeyton whatever. It’s too hard to be perfect every single day. Chill out. One day may alter your rhythm but only you can derail it. Take the next day to reset and try again.
It’s all about balance and not letting the little things get to you. Your children are watching to see what you will do and how you react to a “failed day“. (even just saying the word failed, gross) Strap up, strap on, and own your parenting style. Show your kids that life doesn’t have to be so serious all the time.
Tip 9: Invest in a large roll of paper.
Trust me on this one. I tape a large sheet of paper to the floor and provide crayons. In the early morning (kids awake at 5:45 AM remember?) I usually still have blogs to write, emails to answer, and breakfast to make. Having a place for them to quietly create has been amazeballs.
They color and share the crayons. They ask me to come look. The Sweetness is even discovering her own independence (finally). Do it. Buy the paper. Do it.
Tip 10: Buy my e-book, “10 Tips for Chaos Relaxation”
Seriously though, just relax. Parenting isn’t as stressful as we make ourselves feel it is. Feed them, water them, stick them in the sun, they will be fine. Never doubt your parenting style. Own your worth and know that you aren’t alone. The people who seem to have it together are just better at hiding it. Don’t fall for it and beat yourself up. Take a moment, take a breath, and trust yourself.
It may not be that easy to create toddler rhythm but I hope these tips help! Let me know in the comments what works for you! Also, sign up for my newsletter! Be the first in the know about product releases, giveaways, discount codes, and events. So many new things in the works, you don’t want to miss it!